Clannad: Tomoyo Path

 Well THAT was an emotional trip. Clannad. The game that can make the most hardened warrior sob in their blankies. Well I can't say that Tomoyos route is an exception.

SPOILERS AHEAD

I started this route quite a while ago, and only just now finished it because for some reason I had it in my head that I would not enjoy this route. I had it wrong. Tomoyos story is touching and heart warming and leaves nothing to be desired.
The romantic aspects of it happen rather suddenly to be honest. One moment we were friends having lunch the next we were kissing. She comes to my home every morning to fetch me and drag me to school on time. My best friend and I are famous for being late and she is insistent that we come on time.

There is humor interlaced into the story, as she has a slight obsession with beating my best friend up, and a huge part of her plot is her abusing him for being an annoying prick.

The depth of the story comes when Tomoyo admits to you that she comes from a broken family where everyone is cold and unloving towards one another. They are family in name only, and she seeks the ability to smile and feel joy with her little brother. A little brother that because he was so miserable at his families lack of love tried to kill himself. She wants his first day at highschool to be a truely happy one with no tears, and is striving to be the student body councilor in hopes of saving the Sakura tree lane that they have to travel to on the way to school.  The feelings that flow through my body as I relate to her sadness at her family being cold and Tomoya(the main character)s equal sadness at the lack of his families love.  On a personal note my partner and I are both not close to our families. Events have happened that have left both of us feeling cold and alone in this world and like Tomoyo and Tomoya we realized that happiness and family is about the people who make up your family who are even just friends. Not the people who raised you.

The most heart wrenching part of this story for me is when Tomoya starts feeling depression over the fact he is stagnating and Tomoyo is popular and going to succeed his utter dispair at the fact and knowledge that she will graduate and leave him behind and that everyone will leave him behind took me to the moment when I was 18 and all my friends left. My best friend Ali was going to school and so was Janna, but there was a moment when Ali's parents divorced and the one thing I thought would stay constant. Ali's little brother Evan, left with her mother to Missouri. I was left feeling utterly abandoned and alone in life. I made terrible decisions trying to cure that sadness. Unlike my life, Tomoyo comes back and tells Tomoya that being without him was not worth the success to her and that she loved him. They end up back together.

 Before I play the next route on Clannad I think I will venture on to Tomoyo After and play my way through it at least once. Wish me luck. I am looking forward to the hentai elements that Clannad lacks and Tomoyo After offers :-p

Tensions

I think I prefer things when they are not there or allowed. To have is to take for granted. To not have is to pine and desire. It takes loss or fear of loss to realize how much you desire something. The spark of desire between two beings, stolen glances, fevered dreams of desire. I fear these things as much as I relish them.

Can you learn to love more than one person? Does it cheapen the love for the first? Or does the slight distraction actually illuminate the desire you have for the first person because contrast makes everything more exciting.